STARN: Scots Teaching and Resource Network
The cratur fer the cauld - an ye winnae notice
© - Staurt McHardy, Perthshire Advertiser, 21st January 1997
Last week A wis goin on aboot Midwinter an ane o the perennial problems at this time o year is sniffles an caulds or whit's worse, the dreadit flu. Ilka year it seems we're gettin anither strain o this sair affliction an a great mony fowk hae been in thir beds wi a dose ower the festive break. A wis haein a crack wi ma pal Doddie (name cheenged tae proteck the innocent, which he maist certainly isnae!) an, jist as ye wid expeck fae a Buchan loon - he had the answer. He tellt me his auld uncle Jock as soon as iver he felt a wee sniffle comin on, wad tak tae his bed wi a bottle o the cratur, makin sure he hid hung his bunnet on the fit o the bed. (fit bed? na,na bed fit) Efter thon it wis simply a maitter o suppin awa at the amber nectar till he saw twa bunnets! At thon pynt he kennt he wis ready fer sleep an wid drift aff intae the land o nod wi a smile on his face. As he himsel said, " Gin ye werenae onie better ye didnae notice!". In these days whan mair an mair fowk are gey concernt aboot the diminishin warth o antibiotics an the side effecks o ither industrially manufactured drugs there's mebbe a bit o sense in some o the auld weys. Gin ye arenae ower fond o oor national tipple there's plenty o choice amang ither drinks that wad hae the same effeck - jist as lang as ye mind tae stick tae the wark in hand. Some fowk swear by hot toddy bit A'm ane o thae fowk wha cannae bear tae see oniethin in whisky bit mair whisky - or mebbe a splash o water. Luckily bein a kettlebiler, (male o the Dundonian sub-species) A've lang been aware o the medicinal properties o derk rum. An whit wrang cuid there be in celebratin Scotland's ancient internationalism than sippin on the product o the sugar cane grown alow the sunny Carribean skies, in the middle o dreich Scottish winter. A'm shair if Burns had ever gotten tae Jamaica he would hae gien us an ode or twa tae thon fine dark fiery liquid, an A've heard mair nor a couple o Jamaicans tell me that rum an freedom gang thegither, jist as muckle as whisky an freedom.